Top Horror Flicks of 2011... sort of

Since it's February, I thought now would be the perfect time to post my year-end best of list.  You know, to beat out all the competition from the rest of those other bloggers and get my list out first to show how smart I am and stuff.

Oops.

Truth be told, it's just too dang difficult to get my arse out to the theaters and see new flicks as they premiere.  With two young kids in my house, I'm lucky if I can get to the movies once a month to see the latest singing chipmunk flick.

And so, I'm left with waiting around until Netflix or On Demand can provide me with the movie that everyone was buzzing about.

Five months ago.

So, since I'm finally sort of caught up with what the cool crowd was into, I can now present you with my definitive list of the

BEST HORROR FILMS OF 2011

Wow.. ok... Well, I'd love to to that, but just between you and me, here's the deal.

This year kinda sucked for horror.  I mean, really.  There was not one single horror movie that really blew me away this year - no Let the Right One In, no The Ring, no The Devil's Backbone.  There was some kinda good stuff and lots of not so good stuff. And as usual, the best stuff wasn't even produced by Hollywood.

So, I've had to expand my horizons a bit and open up the list to thrillers, sci-fi and grindhouse movies as well to be able to field a proper team.  So here we go:

BEST HORROR/THRILLER/SCI-FI/GRINDHOUSE FILMS OF 2011

- I Saw The Devil  Ji-woon Kim's masterful ultimate revenge flick.  I don't know what it is about the South Koreans, but they love themselves some revenge!  Please tell me you've seen OldBoy.

- 13 Assassins  ok, I know this isn't even a horror/thriller/sci-fi/grindhouse film, it's a samurai action flick, but it was still better than most anything I watched last year, so it makes the list.  It's my list dammit! 

- Troll Hunter  A hilarious mockumentary that brings storybook trolls to life.  What's cooler than hunting a 200 foot mountain troll with a UV gun to try to turn it into stone?  Nothing.

 - Stake Land  Yes, I know, technically this came out in 2010, but I've had stuff to do you know - so gimmie a break.  A great post-apocalyptic zomie-ish vampire western road movie.  With tremendous attention to character development and tone.

- Super 8   The first big ol' Hollywood film on this list.  A great premise and it absolutely nailed the late 70's early 80's vibe of running around with your buds with a Super 8 camera.  I was there.  I was that kid running around. I should know.
I loved the first 2/3rds of this movie but then it kinda fell apart at the end.  Too bad.
Do I really need to mention all the gratuitous lens flares that J.J. Abrams has fallen in love with?

- Grave Encounters  I almost saw this low-budget indie film in Chicago in 2010 when Enter the Dark premiered there.  But then the festival was running way late and we had to bail.  This is one of the better found-footage horror flicks out there.  A predictable setup of a tv ghost hunting team spending the night in a spooky location is handled well with some nasty twists and turns. 

 - Tucker & Dale vs Evil  A very funny entry in the now well-established horror/comedy genre.  Best one since Shawn of the Dead and Slither.

- Rise of the Planet of the Apes  For a big tent-pole summer blockbuster, I thought it was very entertaining.

- Black Death  Well-done medieval-witch-hunting flick.  'nuf said.

- The Woman  Lucky McKee, the deranged director of cult favorite, May, brings you this very sick and twisted tale of a family man and the feral woman pet he keeps in his basement.  And shares with his family. Pretty standard setup... right?

- The Rite  Well-crafted, serious take on demonic possession and one man's faith.  Oh yeah, and Anthony Hopkins is his usual awesome self.  A lot of people didn't seem to like this film.  I think they've burned out their retinas and brains with too many episodes of The Kardashians and Jersey Shore.  Settle in and watch a mature and thoughtful movie every once in a while, willya?

- YellowBrickRoad  Another cool indie film that leads a team of investigators into the woods to research the mysterious deaths of an entire small town.  Another great setup that slowly builds its tale of madness gets under your skin.  It may take a wrong turn here or there and you may not like the ending, but it sure sticks with you days afterwards.

 - Attack the Block  The darling of last year's SXSW festival is a hyperactive tale of British street kids duking it out with space monsters.  Think Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels meets, oh I don't know, any alien invasion flick. 

- Dead Hooker in a Trunk  Yes, yes, once again this little gem actually came out in 2009, but it didn't get its wide release until this year.  If you haven't heard of this film yet - where the hell have you been??  The Soska sisters' loving tribute to all that is grindhouse-y, Dead Hooker makes up for its no-budget shortcomings by being relentlessly entertaining.

- Hobo With a Shotgun  Speaking of grindhouse... With a little more budget, a pissed-off Rutger Hauer and lots of colorful lighting, Hobo more than delivers on it's exploitation promise.

- Paranormal Activity 3  The problem with these PA flicks is they all fit the same pattern - slowly establish weird goings-on, give the doofus guy a reason to relentlessly videotape everything, ramp up the thrills and then give us a little twist at the end.  This installment works because of the clever use of the oscillating fan-o-cam and it's Wicker Man-esque finish.
  

- Insidious  I know I ripped on this film when it first came out, but I've changed my mind.  No... not really.  After seeing it again however, I really like the film up until the stupid ghost busters show up.  So I'm recommending the first half of the film. Then turn it off and go do something useful with your life.

Halloween treats for all!

Happy Halloween! To celebrate the day when the dead walk amongst the living, I've posted my award-winning horror short film, Enter the Dark on YouTube and Vimeo for all to enjoy absolutely free.

Just make sure to watch it fullscreen. At night. With the lights off!

Then, if you liked what you saw, you could help me out tremendously by heading over to our facebook page and "liking" us (I know, that sounds so 8th grade pathetic and needy).  And also bop on over to out IMDB page and give us a great rating (somehow I don't think 6.2 stars quite does the film justice).

...and remember please, please, take out all batteries from children's toys when not in use.  They really can be quite a nuisance when taken over by evil spirits.  You'll thank be later.

Trust me.

Enter the Dark's FREE Online Halloween Premiere

It's been a great run.

My little horror film which started out originally as a simple exercise in micro-budget filmmaking has now played in over 30 film festivals worldwide, garnered 6 awards, and introduced me to a whole new family of horror and indie film enthusiasts.

Along the way, I've traveled with the film from it's premiere in Chicago last year, to screenings in Sacramento and San Francisco.  I've made connections with fellow filmmakers and fans that I hope to nurture into collaborators and evangelists for my future work.

As I look back on the past year, it has been much more than I would have hoped.  I am deeply grateful for all the help I received along the way - mostly from my tremendous group of friends that just happened to be my cast and crew, and also from the numerous horror fans, bloggers and festival directors that championed our cause.

Heartfelt thanks to all!

And now, as the festivals wind down, in recognition of the great year we've just had, I'd like to offer you something for free...

Yes, that's right kiddos, Enter the Dark will be going live on the big bad worldwide web this Halloween!

See what all the fuss has been about.  See why folks much smarter than me have been saying things like:

…Enter the Dark, ladies and gentlemen, is what independent film making is all about.
The suspense was built up so finely that it almost started making me have a claustrophobic reaction in my room.  HORROR SOCIETY

Miro's story works like a good horror tale should, suckering us in with one hand while it's preparing to pop up and scare us with the other.  There's a command here that can't be taught, and Miro shows a natural gift for creating tension.  FROM MIDNIGHT, WITH LOVE

…a very surreal, scary and realistic depiction of a universal fear that all of us have…
...a sonic achievement of style and horror, but in a very psychological way.  SCARY FILM REVIEW

…Enter the Dark proves once again a good ghost story simply needs to put emphasis on the story and not flashy effects or big budgets in order to provide some fun and scares … delivers everything I look for in a horror short.   ALL THINGS HORROR

Halloween - Monday night, Oct. 31, 2011 at 5PM Pacific Time, Enter the Dark will me made available for free for the first time ever on YouTube and Vimeo.   And there it shall live - for all to see whenever you dang well please, in the comfort of your very own home.  Copy it - send the link around worldwide - make fun of it - argue about it - I don't care, the more the merrier!

So now there's no excuses - you cheappos who won't pony up $1.95 to watch a 30-day stream from IndieFlix.  Or you lazy types who couldn't bother to travel to one of the more than 30 festivals worldwide where it has already screened. No, that's fine - just stay right there.  Yeah, don't move hardly a muscle - just click your little mousy-thingy and flood your computer with 17 minutes of spooky good times.
Be my guest.

Really.

Did I mention that it will now be FREEEEE!??!?!?

(good - just checking...)

My gift to you.

Enjoy!

What is a Horror Movie?

Ok  kiddos, hate to go on a rant here, but let me make this perfectly clear...

BLACK SWAN IS NOT A HORROR MOVIE!!!!

(phew... glad to finally get that off my chest)

It is psychological thriller that examines a young woman's descent into madness.

Is it scary?  Yes.
Is it disturbing?  Yes
Is it a horror movie?  No.

Just because a film is scary, suspenseful, disturbing, even terrifying, that does NOT make it a horror movie.

Let me tell you a little secret...   Are you ready?  Ok, here goes...

Jaws is not a horror movie either.  (uh oh, I can hear the masses grumbling)
Neither is Psycho. (ducks head, awaiting flying cookingware)
Silence of the Lambs? ...forget about it - it's a straight up thriller (hey, put that pitchfork down willya? lemme explain!)

Stop looking at me like that, Lecter, lemme explain

I tend to be protective of the term "horror".  To me, it represents a very specific type of movie, and in this age of inclusiveness, I feel people have tagged many films as "horror" in order to justify the genre.  They want to say, "Hey look!  Look at all the "horror" films that have won Oscars!  We're legit!  We're not the grade-B low-budget degenerate shlockfest that people think we are.  Please like us..."

Well EFF THAT!  Horror does not need justification or legitimacy.  It's just fine as it is, thank you very much - in all its bloody, subversive, thought-provoking glory.

Therefore, I think a little clarification is in order.  A comprehensive definition of what a horror film is, so these constant mis-classifications can stop.  If a term like "horror film" is used incorrectly, eventually it loses its meaning and has no value anymore.

Once we have a solid definition we can use that as a filter to pass a bunch of movies through it and see how it stands up under scrutiny.

I'll take the first stab - here's my definition.  A horror movie has to have the following elements:

- it has to have an element of the supernatural (witches, ghosts, demons, alternate realities, etc)
or
- it has to have a monster (some creature that does not actually exist)
AND
- its primary aim has to be to elicit fear, horror, disgust or suspense.

This means that many of the most famous movies that you see on those best horror films lists, ARE NOT EVEN HORROR FILMS!

Ok, let's go back to the films already mentioned and pass them through my filter.

Lovecraft quote of the month

... I felt the strangling tendrils of a cancerous horror  whose roots reached into illimitable pasts and fathomless abysms of the night that broods beyond time.
- The Lurking Fear

C'mon, you gotta love it.  Who else would have the audacity to actually put that to paper.

Priceless...

Spook Hunt Scene 5 Notes - an unwelcome late night visitor

We recently shot scene 5 from my indie short movie, Spook Hunt.  The usual suspects were there to make the evening happen - actors Rob Sandusky & Charles Yoakum, Director of Photography Rob Weiner (with his Canon 7D) and Ben Weiner recording audio.  Oh yeah, and me running around like a goofball trying to do too much as usual.

(Charles pleads his case)

We only had a couple of hours to shoot so I had picked a fairly easy section of scene 5 to cover.  Charles discovers another piece of ghostly "evidence" and tries to convince Rob of it's validity.  Rob is not only not convinced, he's now convinced that Charles is just messing with him, gets pissed off and storms out of the room.  Pretty simple. The boys did a great job of building up the scene and hitting their emotional marks.

(Rob is not impressed)

After the shoot wrapped, I spent the usual hour or so transferring and checking the video and audio files.  Of course, when I finally tried to go to sleep, my head was still swimming with ideas and questions and recapping the evening.  I started thinking about upcoming scenes that we need to shoot and ways to make them better.  Can I make this part scarier, can I build more tension, a better payoff - what if this happened... or they saw this... or heard this...??  So I'm laying in bed at around 1:30 am, filling my head with the scariest shit I can think of to see if it will work in my movie.  I am now in that weird half-sleep state where part of my consciousness has drifted off, while the other part keeps chugging along working on the movie, like a computer that won't shut down.

I change positions in bed so I'm now facing the side of the bed closest to me and I see this staring at me:

 (please leave me alone and kindly visit my neighbors, m'kay)

Well, actually it wasn't exactly that (that is the demon from the Exorcist), it was actually a lot scarier than that and I could hop over to Photoshop and render a more accurate version for you but I really have no desire to force myself to remember that image with any level of detail.

As soon as I see this demon I literally levitate off the bed and propel myself to the opposite side of the bed whereupon I crash into my wife while uttering a totally pathetic shriek.  She is not too happy with me.  I dare not tell her what I've just seen.

I look back to the side of the bed and of course it is no longer there.  I try to convince myself that it was just a trick of my mind.  A left-over spectre from my strange sleep-state.  You think about ghosts, demons and scary shit for long enough and of course your dreams will be filled with them.

This is not the first time my dreams have been plagued by haunted images.  The thing about making horror movies is that they live in your head for years at a time.  You are constantly thinking about the most violent, horrific and terrifying things.  When Lis and I were putting finishing touches on The Commune, I had some horribly messed-up dreams.  Now as I'm trying to wrap up Spook Hunt, I am getting visited again.

However, the thing about this last vision was - it really wasn't a dream.  I did not dream I woke up, rolled over and saw a demon staring at me.  I actually did wake up, roll over and see a demon staring at me.  Now obviously, in my ghostly-obsessed state, my tortured mind must have simply conjured a demonic image where there were only abstract patterns of light and shadow.

Right?

That's what I continue to tell myself every night as I try to doze off to sleep - always keeping one eye on the watch for my unwanted late night visitor.


(... by the way next time, remind me to make a comedy - or at least not shoot a horror film in MY FREAKING HOUSE!!)

Top Things Horror Movies Taught Me

Or things I actually still do as a grown-up man because of horror movies:

- I never sleep with my arm dangling off the edge of the bed.  I don't even like to have my hands exposed.  Do you really want to wake up with the sensation of someone holding your hand when you're the only one in your bed?

- I never walk into a dark bathroom and look at the mirror while turning the light on.  I always walk in, look down, turn the light on... wait.. and then look into the mirror.  You never know what you'll find looking back at you.

- I never swim at night- oceans, lakes, pools, hot tubs - I don't care.  Even bathtubs are suspect.

 (dinner is served)

- I always sit facing the entrance when I'm at a restaurant (oh that one could be because of too many Scorsese films...)

- I never pick up hitchhikers.

 (wanna see something REALLY SCARY??)

- I never walk around a dark forest at night. (I actually had to do this once to search for my lost dog and it was not pretty - I kept hearing snapping twigs echoing from the canyon walls).

- I never EVER play around with Ouja boards or seances - you're just asking for trouble.

(see - I told ya)

And things I always keep in mind (though they haven't actually happened to me yet):

- If you're with a group of friends in a dark and spooky place, and you're the one cracking jokes - you're probably going to die soon.  If you're also a minority - forget about it... you're already dead.

- If you're in a foreign country and some unbelievably hot model chicks ask you and your buddies to spend the night in their room - run away.  If you've already spent the night in their room... you're already dead.

  (eh - maybe it was worth it...)

- Always try to be extra nice to elderly eastern-European grandmothers.  Especially those with really nasty teeth and bad eyesight.

(yeah - like that)

- When you have a choice between a flashlight and a chainsaw... please... I mean c'mon people!

- Never trust a clown.

(now just think about this a sec kiddo - just why would a clown be living in a sewer...?)

- When someone specifically tells you not to go into a particular room - you might want to heed their advice.

- If your littler sister gets sucked into the tv - sorry... tough break.  I mean mom always told you not to sit too close...

 (you're on yer own beatch)

- Always shoot for the head - and puh-leez kick the gun/saw/knife/chainsaw/sawed-off-shotgun away from the madman/zombie/monster's hand, or better yet, use it to shoot/slash/decapitate.

(yeah - what he said)

- Never go back for the cat.

 (oh Jonesy... here kitty kitty...)

My Favorite All-Time Lovecraftisms

You know, those, antiquated adjectives or quirky twists of a phrase that are so uniquely H.P. Lovecraft:
- cyclopean cities
- sky-flung monoliths
- unnatural geometry
- tottering houses
- gulfs of time
- incomprehensible realms
- unnamable, unmentionable
- undreamable abysses
- swarthy
- eldritch
- Stygian, Phrygian
- leered mockingly
- loathsome tittering
- bloated corpulence
- unhallowed blasphemies
- immemorial lunacy
- shambling forms
- spectral moonlight
- shapeless things
- "The ___ in/of the____"   story titles

What are some of your favorites?

Disneyland - The Scariest Place on Earth

It's common knowledge that those things that terrified us as a child eventually become the neuroses that plague us as adults.  And one thing that clearly stands out for me as a child was being led into a small dark room, the only exit quickly closing behind me while a scary-sounding man mocked me:

“Welcome, foolish mortals, to the Haunted Mansion. I am your host – your ‘Ghost Host.’

Then the paintings on the walls started growing as the whole room seemed to be growing with it. Or was I shrinking?

“Your cadaverous pallor betrays an aura of foreboding, almost as though you sense a disquieting metamorphosis. Is this haunted room actually stretching? Or is it your imagination, hmm…?”
 
It didn't help any that some of the people in the room with me seemed to be tittering, as if this was funny.  Couldn't they see that this was NOT FUNNY.  Something was VERY WRONG HERE!

I wanted out.  Simple as that - mom, get me outta here ok?


“…And consider this dismaying observation: this chamber has no windows, and no doors... which offers you this chilling challenge: to find a way out! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Of course, there's always my way...”

Lights go out.  NO WAY OUT? WHAT!!!?!?

Some people start to scream and then BANG!!!  With a flash of lightning a hanging man is revealed RIGHT ABOVE MY HEAD!!

Pure animal instinct flows through my veins and hits my adrenal glands like molten electricity.
Flight or fight. I choose flight.

GET ME OUTTA HERE!!!

I'm told I cannot leave.  It's just make-believe. Get in the moving car and enjoy the ride.

Yeah, right.

Flash-forward a few decades as my family and I visit the Happiest Place on Earth.  I have not been back since that fateful night.  This is also the first time for my two boys, ages 4 and 7.  As an adult I want to re-experience some of the demons that haunted me as a child.  This place is full of them.  I want to see with adult eyes what was so scary to me as a child.  Maybe I can gain some insights into what dark alchemy makes something "scary", and use that in my movies.

Maybe I can sleep better at night.

R.I.P. Frank Frazetta

I was saddened to hear of the death of the legendary Frank Frazetta this morning.

The Vault of Horror did a nice write-up about his life and legacy.

The amazing Conan paperback covers were my introduction to Frazetta's work - and to a world of larger than life heroes, monsters and oh yeah... those luxuriously captivating women!  I would spend hours falling into those canvases and swimming in those scenes that seemed so real - a doorway into another world. My limited brain could not begin to fathom how a person could dream up, yet alone put on canvas such extraordinary images.

Others like Boris Vallejo and Chris Achillios would follow, but none could touch the blazing talent of the master.  He was a prodigious talent, a huge atlas of a man whose broad shoulders many, many people would stand on to produce much of what we know of the visual language of fantasy, sci-fi, sword & sorcery, and horror.

Frank was an overwhelming influence on me as a young artist and continues to shape the way I view composition, color, and dramatic tension within the image.

He will be tremendously missed, but we are fortunate that his visions will live on forever in the fabric of our daily lives.